More Guerilla Wit & Savage Wisdom from I LUV VIDEO Employees

--August, 2008

Compiled by Bronte Bejarano

In the Company of Men (Neil LaBute, 1997)

Every time i watch this movie a little piece of me dies...but it's worth it. It is pretty f'n good. -alex

How to Get the Man's Foot Outta Your Ass (Badasssss!) (Mario Van Peebles, 2003)

Not only is this far more funny, interesting, and well directed then you would have expected from a Mario Van Peebles film, to boot it's legitimately just a badass movie for lack of more creative terminology. Mario is commanding and almost iconic in the portrayal of his father and while his performance is the best in the film, the mythology encircling the birth of blaxploitation movies is simply amazing! -john

 
Star Wars: The Clone Wars, Volume One

I wanted to cry when i watched this, it's so damn good! This is much, much better then any other products of the star wars franchises that have come in wake of the originals This makes me remember what it's all about. -John

Star Wars: The Clone Wars, Volume Two

Dear God why wasn't Genndy Tartakovsky chosen to direct the new star wars trilogy? Clone Wars one and two are amazing, this would have made a superior live action film, the pace and the direction are excellent! Watch these- John

Ghosts of the Abyss (James Cameron, 2003)

I've got a great idea. Let's throw Bill Paxton in a deep sea submersible crate and see what type of comments he comes up with on the spot. Seriously man, what were you thinking? - Jon

Penitentiary II (Jamaa Fanaka, 1982)

I pity the fool who don't rent this!

Django (Sergio Corbucci, 1966)

This is a great western, bloody and without remorse- jrw2000

Death Proof (Quentin Tarantino, 2007)

I wish it was suck proof-aaron

Hooray! Quentin Tarantino made a gear head movie! And you know what, it's terrific! Ohh and Kurt Russell still got it...I was really impressed also with Tarantino's attention to detail to getting some of the most renowned people in stunt work to be in this film, watch the special features, they're pretty cool! I recommend this. -De

The Good Girl (Miquel Arteta, 2002)

-This one pleasantly surprised me. Writer Mike White has a comedic sense similar to the writers of Waiting for Guffman & Best in Show, Christopher Guest & Eugene Levy. This is very funny and it tells a nice story. There are quite a number of quotable lines in this one. -Ann

-I too was pleasantly surprised by this movie. Jake Gyllenhaal is hilarious, creepy, and cute and all at the same time. I usually hate romantic comedies, but I'm glad I gave this one a chance. -natalie

Hitch (Andy Tennant, 2005)

Not even Will Smith's stunning intelligence or the sanity of the poor souls who are forced to watch this can save it. In the Fresh Prince's Words, "You know, parents are the same, no matter time nor place. They don't understand that us kids are gonna make some mistakes." This is an example.

The Holiday (Nancy Meyers, 2006)

Although I once begrudgingly accepted the term "chick flick" as a derogatory universally fixed phrase I can do so no longer because that would mean this movie is a chick flick! Which would imply that "chicks" watch terrible, horrifying, meaningless, ridiculous movies and truth be told, we don't. -ing

I Think I Love my Wife (Chris Rock, 2007)

-I think i love this movie! This is the second movie Chris Rock has directed and I think he did an amazing Job. This was co-written by Louis C.K who I think is hilarious. -alex

-This is not one of the crappy Chris Rock movies you're use to. Side note: this is co-written by Louis C.K and if you don't like Pootie Tang, I have nothing to say to you.

Idiocracy (Mike Judge, 2006)

-This movie is fucking awesome and shit. It's like totally cool. Fuck you. "It says on your chart you're fucked up, you talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded." word. -alex

10 Things I Hate About You (Gil Junger, 1999)

1. No violence 

2. No Nudity

3. It's Cheesy 

4. Too Trendy

5. John Hughes wanna-be

6. Set in California

7. Not Funny

8. No Cannibalism

9. No Goats

10. Good for Kids 

Borat (Larry Charles, 2006)

Sacha Baron Cohen is the funniest man alive. I'd make sexy time with him.

Breakfast of Champions (Alan Rudolph, 1999)

Ok so you wanna watch this even though you know it's gonna be bad. Stop. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath, Re-evaluate your existence, above all rent something else! This is so much worse then I thought It would be, so much mush and botched art filmmaking it'll make you scream. Get something else.

CSA: The Confederate State of America (Kevin Willmott, 2004)

This is great. It's ruthless and honest and pretty right on. It gets a little unbelievable at the end but still it's a really cool idea and very well done. The commercials are hilarious and terrible and way more offensive then anything on Wonder Showzen - Ben

The Long Ships (Jack Cardiff, 1964)

A nice rowdy little viking adventure movie. -Jon

The President's Analyst (Theodore J. Flicker, 1967)

Egah, too dam funny. This is some paranoid conspiracy craziness, sprank, KCB, CIA, CSD, hippies, communists, and Kung-fu -- it's all here baby! -Scott

Free and Easy (Edward Sedgwick, 1930)

Yes! Watch greedy and stupid movie executives piss away Buster Keaton's talent! Watch his career fizzle as he's forced to play a character completely the opposite

of what he built his fame with. Free and easy indeed! Weee!

The Matador (Richard Shepard, 2005)

Pierce Brosnan has, for the last time, I believe, elevated something that could have been total crap into something more than that. It was actually pretty inspired. He has made this worth watching. -John

My Super Ex-girlfriend (Ivan Reitman, 2006)

This got a pretty bad rap from some But i would be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy it. A little predictable but whatever. I laughed quite a bit. -John

Polish Wedding (Theresa Connelly, 1998)

No, it's not "hilariously funny" as the cover claims but an often difficult but bearable wise little tale of a Polish family living in the north. A study of love and marriage and the weird ways fate fucks with your lives and makes decisions for you. Hell i'd just rent this to see Claire Danes running around tomboyish and barefoot. -g

Saved! (Brian Dannelly, 2004)

hey! This movie is actually pretty good. Jena Malone isn't nearly as annoying as usual and Mandy Moore is fucking hilarious, if only she would quit that music career. -Sarah (Macaulay Culkin however, remains unfathomably creepy)

The Double-D Avenger (William Winckler, 2001)

Greatest one-liners in cinema history!

Dummy (Greg Pritikin, 2002)

This movie is fair to middling...the dummy is creepy. Adrien Brody does okay and Milla Jovovich is very hot, even in army fatigues. -Sarah

Eulogy (Michael Clancy, 2004)

This is one of those 30 something family dramas in which estranged siblings jaded on life reunite and mend their personal rifts by smoking grass and blathering emotionally. It sucks. -Jon

Ghost World (Terry Zwigoff, 2001)

Creepy old record geek dude likes em young.

Marie Antoinette (Sofia Coppola, 2006)

Save your money and eat some cake. -sara

Melinda and Melinda (Woody Allen, 2004)

This is a Woody Allen movie! The ol' pervert is going low-tech. -John

M*A*S*H (Robert Altman, 1970)

Who would have guessed that all those years a theme song extolling the virtues of suicide was being ingrained into our collective subconscious? Anyways I was expecting this movie to lay down some serious "frivolity of war"-type shit, but thankfully it never got too heavy handed for me & it also stays entertaining while avoiding any particular narrative track. It's really pretty amazing that it was successful at all. -John

Team America: World Police (Uncensored) (Trey Parker, 2004)

Fuck Yeah!-S

See it!!! Love it!!!-Elijah

This is one of the funniest, smartest movies i have ever seen. if you don't like it you are probably an uptight douche bag that never likes anything fun. -Ben

I laughed so hard. So hard i almost burst a blood vessel in my eye on this one, I know cuz i did that one time. -John

Tomcats (Gregory Poirier, 2001)

This is a misogynistic piece of shit.- Amanda

Troop Beverly Hills (Jeff Kanew, 1989)

Awesome early 90's blast from the past (or my past anyways). Great, fun movie about Beverly Hills girlies trying to rough it to prove they can. Shelley Long is really funny and Jenny Lewis stars as her adorable daughter. I recommend it!- alex

Year of the Dog (Mike White, 2007)

Well, to begin with, don't expect light comedy here This is definitely laden with death, its consequences, and, in a weird way some PETA-style propaganda. It's about losing your sense of self due to the loss of something short-lived and having to regain a purpose. Only the main character becomes a pushy picketing animal rights activist...I wasn't impressed.-alex

Jawbreaker (Darren Stein, 1999)

Rose McGowan...damn, bitchy has never been so sexy. This is campy fun, maybe even guilty pleasure-ish. I recommend it. -Alex